Break-ups never get better regardless of how many times you have had them. They will always be hurtful, confusing, and never the same for any two people. The situation may always be similar, but the feeling is always unique for each couple. Losing someone you have shared so much with can never be easy, not even for the strongest heart. Relationships are defined differently based on the people in them. However, when it comes to picking oneself up and recovering from the whole situation, some rules will always remain constant;
1. Don’t Be Spiteful
In most cases, after a break-up, you will find that the involved people are insulting each other and doing things to make the other person hurt too. In the heat of the moment, this might feel like the right thing to do, but it’s never right. As a matter of fact, sometimes it’s better not to be in contact at all. The no contact rule is actually something guys use all the time when they want to get their ex back. You should be aware that it works for them because if your ex suddenly doesn’t call you or SMS you, it is not unusual to feel needy.
That feeling that you have been betrayed even if the relationship was not working will always be there. Speaking harshly will never solve anything; neither will it make you feel any better. You need to compose yourself, speak your mind honestly, and avoid nasty comments. You would be feeling better at the end of that heated moment if you didn’t utter any nasty comments.
2. Don’t Fall For “Let’s be Friends Then” Phrase
A break up is a blow that takes time to heal. In most cases, none of you two want to be the one responsible for ending it unless it was that toxic. You may find an ex claiming that they want to be friends with you even though you are no longer in a relationship. The idea can be very enticing, but it’s not good for you at all. While it is meant to soften the break-up blow, you had a connection that will remain there if you don’t cut ties with each other. You will also be unable to move on with your life with them around.
3. Leave People Out Of It
We have people who we trust with our issues and secrets. We share with them the challenges to relieve ourselves from the stress of holding up too much emotion. After a break-up, you are confused and aren’t sure what to do with your life. If at this moment you go about telling everyone about your issues, be sure it will come back to you at the end of it all. You need to talk to supportive friends and those who won’t judge you regardless of what happens afterward.
4. Change Your Routine
When in a relationship, there are things that you are used to doing as a couple. When you keep remembering what you and your ex were doing, you might end up holding on to memories that will hinder you from moving on. When these thoughts start hitting you up, you need to change your routine so you don’t have to do things that you two used to do in the past. It’s not going to be simple or comfortable, but you need to adapt to singlehood if you are to recover and move on.
5. Never Seek Revenge
When getting into a relationship, we are always risking another heartbreak. However, we tell ourselves that even if it ends, we will have had a good time. The best we can do at that particular moment is hope for the best. Nobody plans for the inevitable. Therefore, the thought of seeking revenge should never cross your mind. Learn to accept that it is over, hold on to the good memories, and make peace with the fact that it wasn’t meant to be. Being bold and speaking up for yourself isn’t revenge; it’s a sign that you are still intact regardless of the heartaches.
6. Rebound
One break up doesn’t have to rule out what you love life should be. You should always feel free to move on and find love elsewhere. However, this should depend on the kind of person you are. Don’t jump into another relationship to forget the previous one. This will make you feel worse and probably break you more. Rebound only when you feel you are ready to.
7. Nothing Last Forever
The first few days will feel like hell, but one day you will wake, and the pain will be gone. Don’t beat yourself up because of a break-up. You will recover eventually.
Breakups happen every day and to almost everybody. How we choose to handle our break-ups is what determines what will happen next. Try following the rules above to recover more quickly and not feel so bad about it.
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